Bill was an ugly guy. People would leave a restaurant when he showed up, and once a whole stadium even cleared out and he had to watch the football game all alone. That’s how ugly he was. It’s hard for you to realize how ugly Bill was, because if you ever saw him you would look away immediately so as not to damage your retina, and therefore you wouldn’t have the image of someone so ugly in your brain to recall when I talk about a really ugly guy like Bill. He was so ugly his friends wore blindfolds around him. Read more . . .
Michael Tries to Do Something
Upon retirement, Michael bought a ticket to Mars. He had made good money working all those years and plunked most of it down on a one-way passage to the red planet. Round trip would have been too expensive, and he figured he would probably die out there anyway.
Jeanie Cartwright was pretty and popular. Her friend Molly McQueenie was popular but not pretty. Molly was a fair bit overweight and had a mole on her cheek. Some moles have hair growing out of them, which makes them even more unattractive. Molly’s mole didn’t, but she never got credit for no hairs on the mole. Jeanie was tall and had green eyes and light brown hair. She could have been on the cover of any of those girls’ magazines.